Sometimes You Have to Step Way Back to Really See the Full Picture

People reach out to me almost daily asking for advice, strategies, or a how-to.

I’ve been told so many times that I should be a life coach, a purpose coach, a healer for hire.

Here’s the thing though — I’ve been trying to take off my healer cap. That part of me that always wants to solve things. That always feels called to fix, mend, patch up, soothe.

And no, I’ve never promoted coaching or solicited folks. People literally say, “I’ll pay you to talk some sense into me.”

Through it all, I’ve become more compassionate. But I’m still no nonsense. I’m still going to give it to you real and unfiltered. I’ll speak truth into your spirit and maybe stir up some resistance in you — not because I’m harsh, but because your mindset hasn’t caught up to what I just said.

That’s the part people don’t always talk about.

When you’re unBITTER, you’re not just soft and peaceful all the time. You’re clear. You’re sharp. You’re focused. And when you’re a B.I.T.C.H. — Being In Total Control of Herself — your words carry a different kind of weight.

I know I have a gift.
I know why God placed unBITTER B.I.T.C.H.® on my heart.
I coach — directly and indirectly. And people trust me with their truth because they know I’m going to honor it without sugarcoating.

I'm not a soft landing. I'm just not.

But what I am working on, intentionally, is being a better listener. Slowing down to hear the full story. Letting people be where they are without judgment. That’s what I want for all of us — peace, clarity, and growth without performance.

Today, I came across this list:

5 Signs You’ve Been Called to Coach
• You have the desire to serve
• You’ve been coaching already — unofficially
• You’re collaborative
• You’re authentic
• You’re coachable and committed to your own growth

I said to myself, “Welp. That’s me.”

And here’s the kicker...

The unBITTER B.I.T.C.H.® podcast should be in its third or fourth season by now. But after cancer, I had no desire to rush into anything I wasn’t ready to give 100% to. So I didn’t. I chose peace. I chose stillness. I chose to protect the sacredness of my work and my energy.

This brand is my baby. It’s not just a brand, it’s a calling. And now, I’m starting to connect the dots in a new way.

From my window, downtown Chicago stretches wide. I see all the buildings layered across the horizon, in full view. It’s beautiful. But up close? It’s chaos. Cluttered. Loud. Constricted.

Same with life.

Sometimes, when you’re too close to something, your viewpoint is skewed. Everything feels like noise. Like pressure. But when you take a few steps back, it opens up. You see possibilities. You see the story. You see yourself.

So here I am. Stepping back. Watching the picture shift.

And asking you...

What do you see differently when you step away from the noise?